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Tami Carey's avatar

2. I definitely scan for burgers and friend chicken on most menus. I prioritize cheese and avocados, but I'm also usually on the lookout for figs, goat cheese, or sweet potatoes. If I could set a sauce filter, it would be: maple, balsamic, or a buffalo. When it comes to drinks, I scan for bourbon, tequila, or gin (basically I ignore vodka) and then I go from there with a special interest in unique flavor profiles...and a tajin rim.

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Sabrina Y. Smith's avatar

My husband always struggles to decide what to order at restaurants. He believes I always order better and gets FOMO! 😆

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Tami Carey's avatar

Lol that sounds like a superpower (and the perfect situation where you get to order two things you want!)

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Emily Ruth Hazel's avatar

100% relate on the indecisionist front, from restaurant-scale on up: "I preemptively worry about regret." Love your idea of practicing with lightweight choices and remembering that even with the heavyweights, we can keep making new choices and actively (re)shaping our lives. Also appreciate these thought-provoking questions: "If we welcomed change in each other, could we do the same for ourselves? If we allowed for the possibility of growing apart, would we be more present for what’s needed to grow together?" Always a gift to read your words and hear your thoughts, Tami!

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Tami Carey's avatar

Oh I'm so glad this resonated and I always love hearing your thoughts in these conversations.

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Emily Ruth Hazel's avatar

3. Sometimes I flip a coin—but give myself permission to overrule gravity if the coin lands in a way that makes my intuitive preference more clear (through disappointment or some other emotional clue).

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Tami Carey's avatar

I love that! Sometimes it's so much easier to know what you do and don't want once a flag has been planted. Leaving space to uproot the flag is such a beautiful way of employing that trick.

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Holly Starley's avatar

Shared plates is almost always my choice.

I’m loving dogs these days. My cousin, a chef, made a balsamic fig jam. My sister made figs dipped in dark chocolate. A friend called to see if I wanted a box full of figs from his tree. I’m seeing how lucky I am that my people indulge my tastes.

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Tami Carey's avatar

Ooo I love a balsamic fig jam! Shared plates- party of two 🙋🏻‍♀️

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Holly Starley's avatar

Yesss!

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RJ's avatar

My favorite so far #relatable

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Tami Carey's avatar

Thank you Loaf!! I wouldn't know anything about the Cheesecake Factory menu overwhelm without you and this essay wouldn't even exist 😊

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Cyrina's avatar

LOVED everything about this one! I’m with you on the choices. It is SO hard to know if you’re making the right one, but just making one and owning it is it. You’re right.

Ps, I always look for fries. If there is truffle involved, I’m in.

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Tami Carey's avatar

Yes!! I never really connected choice to my ability to trust myself, but I think that's what it comes down to. Trust that you'll know when you know enough to decide, trust that you will make a good decision even if there is no right one, and trust that you'll be able to empower that decision when you make it. ( Let's discuss this and other things over truffle fries, soon! 😉 )

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